Disclaimer: The Characters of The Sentinel belong to Pet Fly, The SciFi channel and others. No copyright infringementis intended.

BIG BIG thank you to Lynn for the beta job. I never knew that that meant before, but now I do. Writers have the fun of playing with the story - then the poor over worked and under paid beta person makes it look GOOD!!

Apart

by LKY


Jim Ellison briefly glanced at the profile of the man sitting with him in the cab of his F150. The streetlights threw shadows from the heavy raindrops hitting the windshield, then erased by the flick of the wiper. Blair sat unmoving in his seatbelt, staring without recognition at the familiar sights that passed them.

Home.

We made it.

Jim slowed for a yellow light. At 2 am the street was empty. The rainstorm broke while they were in ERwhere the medical staff had carefully checked Sandburg over after his unexpected kidnapping by David Lash.

No cross traffic. Jim risked an infraction and cleared the intersection as the light turned red. He needed to get his friend back to the loft. To safety. To his territory.

The parking lot was full. No surprise this time of night. He needed to talk to the other tenants about assigning parking spaces and posting signs to warn non-residents of 852 Prospect against using this lot. With a sigh he turned the corner and found a spot on the street only a half block away. It would have to do.

"Okay Sandburg. End of the trail."

Blair blinked and looked out the side window.

"Huh?"

"Home, partner"

"oh.. yeah.. good." He fumbled with the buckle to his seat belt with his left hand, his right covering his mouth as a huge yawn threatened to break his jaw. "god.. I could sleep for a week."

Ellison was out of the vehicle and opening the passenger door before the belt could be released. He reached across the grad student, opening the buckle quickly.

"Tricky.." Blair mumbled. "sorry, don't know what's wrong with me.."

Jim eased him out carefully into the rain with a strong hand on his upper arm. "Nothing is wrong with you, buddy. The doctor warned you that your hand and eye co-ordination would be a little off for a while, remember?"

"drugs.." Blair walked toward the building, fascinated with the new tilt to the sidewalk. He tilted his body to compensate but found that gravity was changed as well. "Whoa.. sidewalk `s funny."

"Yeah," Jim agreed pulling the younger man back towards center and moving this arm to a snug hold around his roommate's waist, his other hand replacing the grip on the upper arm. "I've been meaning to have the city fix it."

Blair waited in the dark as the elevator car carried them to the 3rd floor.

"Light burned out?"

Jim smiled patiently. "No, chief. Open your eyes."

"oh." Blair blinked a few times and smiled up at his friend. "Sorry."

"No problem."

Blair's smile faded as Jim pushed open the front door and they stared at the aftermath of the fight between Lash and Sandburg.

Psychopath and Victim.

Blair allowed Jim to pull him further into the room and lead him over to the sofa. In no time at all, he was sitting with the afgahan around his legs and a towel wrapped around his neck catching the drops from his wet hair. He watched dully as the TV was returned to it's stand, lamps were righted, knick-knacks saved, even the kettle filled with water and heating on the stove.

Blair continued to watch quietly from the sofa, until his eyelids became too heavy to stay open. He listened for a while to the sound of sweeping, coffee mugs placed on the counter, cupboards opening and closing.

Sounds of home. Normal, everyday sounds. Sounds he didn't think he would ever hear again.


Jim added a spoon of honey to his tea, none in Blair's - just he way he liked it. He had listened to his guide's breathing and heartbeat as he straightened up, reining in the desire for a more thorough cleaning. That could wait. Hell, after the shooting he could look forward to at least 3 days of administrative leave. SOP for a fatal shoot. Maybe he could even repaint the loft. He stirred his tea absent mindedly as he let his thoughts drift, pleasantly distracted.

The salty smell of tears and the ragged breathing brought him back to the present and he glanced over his shoulder.

He had been expecting something. He wasn't sure what. After Kincaide, Blair had nearly vibrated with tension until Jim had dropped him off at his warehouse/residence/dive-of -a-home. Whatever reaction occurred after he left, happened without an audience.

Blair sat like a statue. Eyes shut but tattle tale moisture seeping out from beneath tightly clenched eyelids. He was trying to hold his breath and let it out in controlled efforts but failing.

Jim carried the mugs into the living area and set them down on a magazine on the coffee table. The coasters had flown off somewhere, waiting to be found and returned to their spot on another day. He sat carefully next to the smaller man.

"Let me help with that towel, okay?" He flicked the bath towel over Blair's head and lightly blotted the rain soaked hair. "Just our luck we have to park a block away during a down pour, huh?" The towel partly covered Blair's face. A shaky hand came up to help and managed to press the edge of the towel to his cheeks, preventing any of the treacherous tears from falling.

"Better?" JIm dropped his hand and reached for the tea mugs. When the towel dropped back to Blair's shoulders, he looked better. More in control. Jim handed his tea over wordlessly and sat back next to his partner. Stretching his legs out under the coffee table he took a small sip from the mug. "You know, Sandburg. You'r bound to feel a little.....intense.. after what you've been through." He snuck a peek at the silent man beside him. "I'd think it would be perfectly normal under the circumstances."

Blair blew on the tea, sipping carefully. "He talked about the others.... His friends, he called them." Fiercely concentrating on his tea, in a quiet, shaky voice, he continued "It was like he judged each of us.. what he liked.. or admired about us.."

Jim sat quietly, staring ahead, letting him finish his thoughts.

"He laughed, man. He critiqued their clothes, intelligence, the cars they drove.." Blair's voice cracked. A tear spilled over, splashing his arm. "Like he could just take what he wanted from us and toss the rest.."

Jim sighed. How did one answer? "Blair, you helped me interview his father. Lash was certifiable. He was without conscience, without remorse."

Scrubbing his face with one hand, Sandburg agreed "Yeah man, totally."

The larger man placed a hand on his friend's forearm. "He's gone. You survived. You did everything right."

A grim smile flashed across the exhausted face. "I'm not so sure, Jim. I was terrified."

"Maybe, but it didn't stop you from using everything you could against him."

"Geesh, man. All I did was talk long enough to make him mad."

Jim finished his tea then stood, carrying the cup to the kitchen sink. "No, you kept him off balance. You stayed alive until I could find you and made enough noise so I would hear you." He turned at the sink and tapped the side of his head. "With ears, by the way, that you trained."


Blair softly laughed into his mug. He put his tea down and drew a shaky breath. His body was sore. His clothes rank and still damp from the warehouse floor, plus the short walk in the rain to the loft. He studied his friend casually leaning against the counter.

His sentinel.

"Thanks man, for finding me."

"No options, Chief. I can't go back to cooking for myself."

Snorting in agreement, Sandburg stood carefully. Satisfied his body seemed mostly straight, he pointed toward the bathroom door. "I stink. I'm gonna shower."

"Not a good idea, junior. You're liable to take a header in the tub. I'm not up to a second trip to the ER this morning."

"Aww, come on, Jim.."

They compromised. Jim started a hot bath while Blair collected clean sweats from his room. Walking slowly into the bathroom, he watched as his roommate sprinkled bath salts into the filling tub.

"Okay, stinky. Out of those clothes."

"What!" Eyes widened in shock. "I can do this, Jim!"

Ellison grinned. "Close your eyes, Sandburg"

"Uh? Why?"

Holding up his hands, palm out, Jim nodded. "Just humor me, okay?"

Blair rolled his eyes and closed them. "Okay, now .. why?"

Jim quietly moved into position. "Now .. keep your eyes closed. And move your head as if you were looking at the ceiling." He watched the young man follow the directions and reached out to grab..

"Whoa!!" Blair's eyes shot open as he found himself at a forty-five degree angle and firmly in the arms of his friend. "Nice catch, man," he mumbled, a little embarrassed.

"Enough said, don't ya think?" the ex-ranger stated, standing him back up again.

He slowly reached out easing the outer layer of clothing off his friend's shoulder. "Sandburg, I was a medic. I've helped six foot five inch rangers take baths. I know you can do this by yourself." He nudged his roommate's arms up as he grabbed the hem of his undershirt and lifted, eyes never leaving Blair's face. " But the idea here is to keep you from bouncing that melon of yours off the tile." He held the slender shoulders steady as he nodded toward the pants. "Okay, you do the rest."

Before Blair knew it, and could think about getting embarrassed, he was being helped into the tub and easing down into the blessed warmth.

"Ooohhh yeah...this is the ticket.." Blair closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the cool wall.

Jim gathered clothes off the floor and stuffed them into the hamper. Fresh towels appeared on the closed toilet seat.

"Fifteen minutes, then I'm coming back." Jim pointed a steady finger at the head of curls. "DONT try getting out by yourself, you still have that sedative in your bloodstream."

Then he was gone. The bathroom door left open a few inches.

After a few minutes of bliss, Blair started to move. He washed and rinsed his hair first. Then he carefully washed his body, taking care with the multiple bruises on his arms and legs, not letting his thoughts dwell on the reason they were there. Most of the fight in the loft was a blur.

Blair became aware of his heart's increasingly fast beat. `NO, don't think about it!' Blair scolding himself, listening to Jim moving around in the loft. `I'm safe. Jim is here', Blair glanced at the door. `No, Jim is not here, but he is close. Just outside..' He breath was becoming rapid, it felt like the oxygen was being sucked out of the small room.

`Your gonna take a nice... a nice bath..'

SHIT! Blair grabbed the side of the tub, suddenly not wanting to be anywhere near the bath water. He started to scramble out, but not able to get any purchase with his feet in the soapy soft water.

Desperate to get out of the bath, he never noticed Ellison rush into the room.


Jim was just finishing his task of securing the front door with wood screws and wooden wedges. A temporary fix until he could repair the door jam when he heard the frantic muttering from the bathroom, then the sounds of sloshing water and sliding skin squeaking on enamel.

"Sandburg?" Opening the door he saw Blair's frightened expression, eyes wide in terror.

"nonononononono..."

Jim moved across the floor, dropping to his knees next to the tub, reaching out to stop the dangerous exodus. "Easy! Blair, calm down. You're safe!" He carefully restrained the student by the upper arms, taking a wave of soapy water in his chest, soaking his shirtfront and lap.

Blair froze. "Jim?"

"You okay?"

Slowly the `deer-in-the-spotlight' look faded, replaced by confusion. The breathing was still fast, but not as rapid as before. Blair stared numbly at his roommate, who still had him by the arms - careful to avoid the bruises.

"Blair, are you all right?"

"um..Jim, I want out now."

"So I gathered. I told you to wait for me." Jim raised up to his feet, effortlessly lifting his friend at the same time.

"Sorry, man. My mind was kinda wandering there for a second." Blair swayed in Jim's hold for a moment then steadied.

"That's okay. Step out slowly. Good. Hold it a second." He let go of one arm and grabbed the towels from the toilet. "Sit."

Blair obeyed, the his eyes widened. "Sorry man." He waved a limp hand at Jim's sodden clothing.

"No problem." Jim tossed a towel toward the other man. "Dry off, but don't try standing." He leaned back over the tub and pulled out the rubber stopper. Taking another towel he blotted at his own wet clothes. They worked quietly, getting Blair into his sweats and toweling the excess water from his hair.

"I managed to get the front door secure for now. What time are your classes today?"

Blair worked a pick through his hair. "Only one afternoon lecture, 2:30. Office hours from 4 to 6, but since it's Friday, I doubt anyone will show." He kept his eyes on the wet floor. "In fact, I could ask Stuart for his notes, and miss attending the lecture altogether, if you need me today."

"Simon wants me in by eleven to meet with IA." Jim started mopping the water from the floor with the towel that Blair had used. "It's just a preliminary meeting, shouldn't last very long. We can get 6 hours sleep, swing by the station and then grab some lunch. If you're sure you're up to it. I'll drop you off at Rainer, run to Home Depot and then pick you up after your class." He tossed the towel into the full hamper.

"kay" Blair yawned. "Can I stand up now? I want to brush my teeth, then crash."

"Okay, but I'm staying right here where I can keep an eye on you." Blair nodded his agreement, shaking his head as jim stood behind him as he brushed his teeth at the sink and rinsed. He looked into the mirror at his friend with a smile. " I think you'll want to leave the room for the next part. I promise to sit down, okay?

Jim gently batted the back of his head, careful to avoide touching the lump on his partner's skull. "Smart ass."


Slipping into his robe, Ellison bundled his own wet clothes into a roll and descended the stairs from his room. The door to the bathroom opened and Jim stood ready as the shorter man exited.

"Ready to sleep?"

"More than ready."

Jim led the way into the small room under the stairs. Books, binders, loose papers and dirty mugs littered the small student desk, chair, bed and parts of the floor. Efficiently clearing a wide path to the futon, he worked on relocating the debris that found its home there. Aware that Blair was watching from the doorway, he straightened and waved the younger man in.

"Okay, recon is complete, I believe we have re-acquired the area. Although for a few minutes it was looking grim. The text books had me outnumbered twenty to one."

"Um, Jim. I'd rather sleep on the couch.. if that's okay..."

Ellison turned slowly, surprised, but keeping his face neutral. Sandburg studied the tribal mask on the wall, just to the left of Jim's head, with rapt attention..

"Blair, wherever you want to sleep tonight is fine." Turning back to the futon, pulling the comforter up and snagging the pillow with the other hand, he handed it over, waiting until the grad student took it and made eye contact. He softly added, "This is going to get easier, I promise."

Blair nodded, swallowing convulsively and ducking his head but Jim hadn't missed the tears in his eyes.


Clean sheets from the closet turned the soft couch into a warm and inviting bed. Blair sank into the bedding with relief, drawing the covers up to his chin. He watched his sentinel check the perimeter. Doors and windows passed inspection. Lights started to click off, until the bathroom light was the only one left, throwing a soft yellow glow across the living room area. Finally standing at the foot of the couch, Ellison gave his friend an easy grin.

"You okay?"

"Yeah,." Blair replied. Warm and sleepy, he nodded. "Thanks for ... everything man. I'm sorry I'm such a basket case tonight."

"I'll overlook it just this once, Chief." The words were soft and devoid of any criticism. Blair couldn't see Jim's face in the shadows, but he could hear the goofy grin in the statement. "We leave in just over six hours, make them count, okay?"

Comforted by Jim's casualness more than he could understand, Blair grinned back. "Hey man, for me six hours is sleeping in!"


A soft shake to the shoulder, "Burning daylight, cowboy." A mug of coffee came into focus, the Rainer University logo visible. Blair knuckled his eyes, yawning widely, almost past the normal range for his jaw.

"Jim, we have got to cut you back on those Bonanza reruns, dude." He sat up slowly, stiff muscles and numerous bruises sang out loudly, prompting a low groan.

"Never. Classic entertainment. Unlike your generation, we were treated to quality programming."

Blair took the coffee mug gratefully, rolling his head to loosen up his neck. He had slept without interruption. He was surprised, shocked even. He'd expected a night of terror filled dreams, but instead, the last thing he remembered was hearing Jim's soft snoring from above. It was almost comical how the man could drop off, maybe it was a sentinel thing. He started to wonder if he could devise a test to compare his friend's sleeping habits with his location, or maybe it was more....

"Here, these will help. Then you need to get dressed. Any leftover symptoms from the sedative?" Jim handed two small tablets over. Tylenol.

"No, I feel fine... so far. What time is it?" He tossed back the medication and squinted at the VCR clock display. Nope, too blurry.

"Ten - twelve. You want dry cereal or do we hit the bakery?" Blair heard him open the refrigerator and begin muttering an inventor of its contents "Milk, ew! Time to toss it. A tomato, but no eggs. Why do we have five difference kinds of mustard, Chief?" Blair heard the fridge door shut. "Never mind, I just answered my own question." Tracking down serial killers played havoc with the domestic duties. "We'll hit the `Three Girls Bakery' on the way to the station."

"Kay, just give me ten." Blair stood, taking a sharp breath from the effort. "Make that fifteen. Then I'll be ready to rock."


The crowd of news reporter hung around the front door to the police station. The weather was mild, the rain storm from last night cleaning the air. Ellison held up one hand with the universal sign for `stop'. Reaching his other hand out to snag Sandburg's coat front he plowed through the mob without a response to the shouts of questions.

He pulled Blair into the lobby and turned to search for one face. Pointing to the man in question he crooked his finger in the `come here' gesture. Don Hass's face broke into a huge grin as he elbowed his way to the front of the crowd.

"Fifteen minutes. Then I'm finished with any questions, got it?"

"Yeah, sure. Thanks detective, I didn't think you'd remember your promise."

"No, I remember. Your tape was very helpful." Jim turned back to his roommate. "Chief, go on up. This will only take a moment."

Blair shook his head. He held the white bag of pastries and small box with two cups of coffee up. "I'm cool, man. I'll just wait with Jake at the front desk."

Jim smiled and nodded. Leave it to Sandburg to be on a first name basis with the uniforms. He directed the newsman and camera crew where to set up, the others having to fall back and watch, their faces green with envy. Soon the bright lights were lit, removing any shadows from the detective's face and the interview was in progress.

Blair offered a bearclaw to Jake and watched as Jim answered the questions quickly, without emotion, giving a lot of credit to the support staff and his fellow police detectives and officers. When the questions got around to the police observer's involvement, Jim looked at his watch and called `time'.

"Could Mr Sandburg answer a few questions?"

"No, you've got your sound bites. Enough time for the six o'clock slot. Now get out of here," Jim answered gruffly. "We've got work to do, okay?"

Disappointed, but still elated from the personal attention, the reporter nodded and signaled the camera man to cut power and pack it up.

The ride up in the elevator was quiet, both men in thought. Blair broke the silence with a question.

"Jim, it's cool you gave Don that exclusive. But doesn't the department have a PR person for this kind of stuff?"

Jim led the way down the hall and into the bull pen. "Yeah, but we did promise him a little special attention. He's a pain in the ass, but we may need him in the future. Simon won't mind. The Chief is happy when it reflects good PR on the department." He shrugged and slipped his windbreaker off and draped it over his chair. He nodded to Henry and Rafe at their desks.

"We come with gifts." He pointed to the bag Sandburg set down on the corner of his desk . "Simon in?"

"Yeah, he's with the DA right now," H answered softly. "How's it going, hairboy? You okay?"

"I'm good, H. Thanks,." Blair shyly answered from behind his sentinel.

"Jim, Simon want's me to take Blair's statement. I can do that while you work up you initial report if you'd like." H stood stretching his back and reaching for his coffee mug. "I've got room two set up."

"Works for me. With luck we can get done and be out of here in less than an hour." Turning to sit at his desk, Jim punched his computer's on button and pulled a battered looking dictionary from his middle drawer.

Sandburg froze when H approached him. "Ready, kid?"

"..uh.."

Aware of Blair's suddenly rapid heart beat, Jim looked at his young friend with concern. "Hey, you okay?" He recognized the look that passed over the grad student's face. Trapped. Fear. "Hold up, H. Give me a second here, okay?"

Henry backed away, frowning slightly. He cast a glance at his partner. Rafe was quietly watching the interaction from his desk. He rose from his chair "Come on, H. Let me show you how to brew some real coffee. Not this swill you tried to pass off on us this morning." He snagged the bag of treats off the desk. "Thanks, Jim."

Alone in the bull pen, Jim slowly walked around his desk and faced his partner.

"It's just a statement, Blair. You've given one before remember?" Jim almost bit his tongue as the question was asked. Great. Remind him of Kincaide. As if he doesn't have enough to worry about. He watched Sandburg drop his head and take a deep breath. In through his nose, out through his mouth. Then one more.

"Right. Right. I know, man.." Blair's eyes darted to the floor, the wall calendar over Jim's left shoulder, then the pencil sharpener on Rafe's desk.

Ellison reached out slowly, taking his friend's arm. "Come on, Darwin. Walk with me." He led Blair back into the hall way and down to the interview rooms. Finding room two unoccupied, he motioned for Blair to take a seat at the table and closed the door securely. The table was empty except for a 4 track tape machine and small microphone. The room was plain, no one way mirror, giving the men privacy.

He joined Blair at the table, moving the folding chair closer so only a corner separated them. He watched his friend set the coffee cups down and then study his folded hands in his lap.

"Okay, as much as I may have dreamed of a time that you would be speechless, I'm going to have to ask for some help here. What is going on inside that head of yours?" He kept his tone light, almost joking, knowing that the circumstances were far from funny.

Speaking so softley that Jim almost missed the response altogether, Blair answered finally,. "Nothing. I'm cool."

Jim nodded silently. Okay, I'm supposed to be a great detective. So, detect. Well, Sandburg is obviously lying. Mouth has one answer, heart beat has another. Although maybe he'd better not let Blair know how easy he was able to monitor his heartbeat just yet. No reason to bring a landslide of new tests down on him just yet. Save it in case I need the big guns. So something has him upset. Jim's eyes moved to the tape recorder. Not the statement, he has given those before. Jim was there at the time and it went just fine....

Oh shit.

He put it together.

In the lobby, Blair standing around, waiting for him to give his interview. Not going ahead and waiting in the bullpen.

He thought back to last night. He had stayed with Blair in the ER. Not leaving the room at all, much to the doctor and nurse's displeasure. At the time, he had stayed more for his own desire than to comfort the kid.

Then in the bathroom, when he'd had the panic attack. They had been separated, a room apart.

Blair had refused to sleep in his own room, but wanted to be just below. He would know that Jim was right above.

Then H's offer to take the statement, while he worked at his desk. Apart. They would be apart.

Oh yeah. Some detective.

"Would you like me to be present during your statement?"

Blair shot a quick look up at Jim's face. "Can you? I mean, without getting in trouble?"

Jim smiled. "I think so. I can't participate. Simon will have to okay it, but yeah, I'm fairly sure no one will object."

Blair grimaced. "God, I'm a wimp, man!" He dropped his face into both hands, elbows resting on the table top.

Jim grabbed both cups of coffee and moved them to safety.

"Sandburg, give yourself a break, okay? Less than 24 hours ago you were expecting to end up floating face down in a duck pond. This sort of thing is going to take some time."

Jim waited, aware that Blair's shoulder's were beginning to quietly shake. His face remained hidden in his hands as his whole upper body developed the same shuddering motions.

Ellison ran a hand down his face. Just sign me up to teach the next counseling class for survivors of serial killers. He was startled by the unexpected sound from his friend.

Snort.. "Oh man," snort .. then what sounded suspiciously like a giggle. The hands were removed to wipe at the moisture coming from closed eyes.

"Face down in a duck pond?" Blair looked with fond amusement at his older room mate. "That is supposed to make me feel better?" Then another snort and a definite giggle escaped before he could cut it off with his hand.

Jim picked up the coffee mugs and handed one over without a word. He tried to keep the `annoyed with the youngster' look on his face... but failing. He removed the lid and took a cautious sip.

"Cut me some slack, Chief. I've been up all night." He let a grin slip out. "You know what I mean though. I told you last night. You're just going to need time." He sipped the coffee again.

"How long, Jim?" Blair removed his own lid and took an appreciative taste, then a second.

"As long as you need, buddy."

The End

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